Sorry :(

I'm sorry.

I don't know what else to say. Honestly speaking, I'm not that kind of person who gets angry or frustrated easily. No matter what happen, I'll just take it lightly and go along with it.

These few days had been crazy. With Christmas drama and dance, dance practice and the coming project meeting, I didn't spend much time in the room. It's busy especially when Christmas night is less than 24 hours away but it makes me happy. I may not be an expert in drama and dance but I do enjoy them. Seeing everything falling into places even if we didn't have much time for practice, it makes me even more thankful to God :)

We just had our intensive dance practice on top of our weekly practice last weekend. Needless to say, my legs were confused and I still couldn't really get all the steps. And now, I'm stuck with painful thigh muscles. The pain worsen every time I walk or using the stairs (God knows how many flights of stairs I have to use from my block to faculty.) But I'm truly enjoying myself. I know I'll manage to get the dance steps if I continue the practice. Pain is part of a parcel of dancing and enduring pain is not something that is so difficult to do. The dance may not be easy and I know there'll be intensive sessions soon but I'm more than willing to embrace them.

The final thing on my list-project meeting. I've always been interested in campaigns or any projects which involve health promotion for I really feel like I can contribute to the society with the knowledge that I have. The moment I knew there's empty space in the project, I jumped into it. But now, everything is going haywire and the guilt is haunting me day after day and with the meeting coming soon, I don't know how to laugh anymore. And to my own surprise, I threw a minor tantrum in the room just now when I thought of the coming meeting. I was really frustrated and I have no clue on what to do. It's my responsibility but it's really beyond my ability. Now, I feel like a burden to the whole project and everybody has the result and I'm still stuck at the starting point. It may be something easy but it's not what I can do and what I'm interested. I'd never thought my job scope will include this when I first put up my hand. Should I give up and step down? I just don't know. If I really cannot do this, why don't I just pass it to somebody who can manage this well? It'll be better for everyone but the guilt is haunting me. I really don't want to hurt the rest and myself too. Just pray that God will guide me through this. I really need the strength to go through this. Just pray that I'll make a wise decision soon.

Really pray that God will bless the Christmas Night tomorrow too. Time may not be on our side but I know that You'll be by our side, watching after us. Just pray that our message will come across to others and touch everyone's heart :)