How to study Medicine?

Something unexpected happened today. I just couldn't believe my ears. 

To cut a long story short, a group mate misunderstood something and of course, the dr was so shocked that she even requested some time with him. The group mate was upset. He misunderstood it because once upon a time, a patient told him something and he just took it without analysing the details. When we were alone without the doctor, he started rambling away. 

"You see, it's all the system's fault. Why must they force us to clerk patient, to go to ward, to LEARN from patient? We have all the text books that we want and the text books' informations are accurate compared to those that were being said by patients. What sort of system is this? What sort of approach is this? Why can't we change the system? What's the point of talking to patients? To learn more mistakes?"

I was stunned when I heard that. After entering clinical years, I realised that it was patients' stories which taught me a lot. Text books may tell me everything but text book is text book, they only show us the fact but when it comes to real life, there'll not be a conversation bubble appearing on top of patient's head with the diagnosis on it. How is one supposed to learn without clerking patients and learn from them? 

True, he knows a lot of things, during the entire on-call, he kept on throwing up all the bombastic medical terminologies but it's sad to see his attitude towards patients. 

Perhaps he's seeing things in the wrong way or perhaps I'm the one who is foolishly learning medicine the wrong way. I don't know. He has his own principles and I have my own. Which is right and which is wrong? I don't know. Perhaps I'm just making a big thing out of a small issue.

But I still cannot accept this sort of attitude. 

10 years later...

Was talking to my friends during dinner and our conversation steered toward the future.

One question came out: "Where will we be in 10 years time?"

Hmmm... Where will I be? I'd like to see myself among children but am I capable to do so? It's still too early to tell.

No matter how life turns out, I hope I'll be a happy person who loves her job :) And I do hope I'm doing something to the community :)

1 more year left. It's going to be tough but I'm currently contented with everything even though it can be busy. I love to be in the middle of something, instead of doing nothing.

All the best to us :)

:)

I have to write about this. You may think that it's childish but whatever, it's my blog and my own personal thoughts. Haha...

Growing up in a family where both my parents are English-language teacher, there'll always be expectation. I tried to live up to it. People may say to me that 'hey, your english is good' but I found ti hard to accept the praises because at the end of the day, all I want is approval from my parents especially my mom who had been my English teacher for 5 years. It can be a bit ( a bit only lah because the others are way too good) heart-breaking when your mum praises the very very good students and then reads your essay and starts to comment endlessly and wonders loudly why her own daughter can't be as good as others.

After secondary school, when I was placed in another circle of students without my mum as my linguistic guidance, I was forced to stand alone. When I read what others wrote, my brain will go into autocorrect mode. I can't help it. Then my friends started to come to me for help. I offered to edit as well. 

Perhaps all these help to improve my writing. I don't know. Yesterday I read a blog post on how public view us doctors graduated from public universities. All commented badly, one even said that 'I'll avoid them like a plaque'.and another said that 'I'll force them to show me their result slips and qualifications. Even then, I'll still avoid them.' and the worst 'I'll go to those who graduated from India, Russia, Indonesia blah blah blah instead of those from local uni.' I was a bit frustrated but it won't help if I comment publicly so I send a rather long comment to my mum. At least 1 non-medical related person will understand. 

To my surprise, she asked me whether I was the one who wrote the comment as it was very good. Content and language wise. 

Finally :) But I know I'm still nothing compare to the very very good ones. At least I'm trying. Thank God :)

PS: Don't misunderstand me, I'm not trying to show off. I'm just a bit excited :P

一人，二人

听人说
到了二十几出这年龄
若还没成双
那人一定很有问题

有伴的人是完美的
毫无瑕疵
人见人爱

无伴的人是丑陋的
全身瑕疵
人见人怜

难道是如此吗？

你我一样都是人
有着种种的优点
种种的缺点
到达种种的终点

不同的是
你身旁多了一个人
有人容忍你
有人接纳你
有人呵护你

而我一人生活
自己负担责任
自己思考后果
自己保护自己

有伴的人不一定快乐
无伴的人不一定沮丧
只是大家有着不一样的观念

这世上有形形色色的人
形形色色的人
配形形色色的人

完美如仙的人不一定有伴
平凡朴素的人不一定孤单

我说
二十几出还很年轻
你说
吃不到葡萄说葡萄酸
明明没人爱
明明没人要
明明不讨喜
还牵强找理由

我的生活
我的故事
剧情还由上帝写
我有我的憧憬
生活目标也与你不同

结局会是如何
我不知道
小小的我只能祈祷
愿我走在对的路
愿我不侵犯上帝
愿我能成为一位好医生
也愿我能成为一位好女儿

I once told my friend of my indifferent towards boy-girl relationship. These days, I'm seeing people getting married and smiling happily in wedding gowns. At the same time, I see people licking their wounds, crawling on all fours trying to find their way out from the leftovers of the relationship they once had. I'm still young, young enough to convince the people around me that it's ok for me to be single. Yet, I'm slightly mature enough to understand things that are going around me.

The friend told me: 'He may have other plans for you though, so even though it's fine to have your preferences and to tell Him your preferences, don't get too dogmatic that you miss out on a blessing He has in store for you.'

Thanks, my friend :)